A NeuroSpicy Spiritual Practice for Managing Medical Visits

Children may find medical, dental, and therapy visits stressful for many different reasons. They could be afraid of unknown and potentially uncomfortable procedures. They may struggle with long wait times. They could be worried about encountering strangers. Such visits have a lot of worrisome potential, even for grown-ups.

 For neurodivergent kids who experience heightened sensory sensitivity, such visits can be even more distressing. Bright lights, noisy waiting rooms, booming or high-pitched voices, the rough texture of an unfamiliar chair – each of these things can overwhelm. Taken together, they may tip a child into melting or shutting down.

Studies find that tactile experiences may be helpful in supporting self-regulation in these circumstances. They tap into early experiences of touch in infancy and soothe a child’s nervous system. Developing a spiritual practice that encourages interacting with a textured object can help children find their calm and peace when they must engage in stressful or challenging healthcare visits.

Collect several small items with a variety of textures. Everyday items, like a terry towel, wooden spoon, rough stone, lego block, furry stuffed animal, and/or a piece of bark, work well. Place the items in a small bag or box suitable for taking places.

Invite your child to explore the different textures of the items. Encourage them to try touching each item in a variety of ways, like rubbing it against their arm or leg, making a circle on it with a finger, scratching it with their nails, or stroking it both with and against the grain. Ask: What sensations do you notice as you explore each item? Which textures feel pleasant? Which textures are uncomfortable? If your child is non-verbal, watch their interactions with each item and notice which generate positive and which negative responses.

After your child has an opportunity to explore all the items, invite them to select one item they like to touch. Choose another item for yourself. Say: Let’s use our items to practice finding our peace. Close your eyes and feel the texture of your item. Stroke it with your fingers or rub it against your body. (pause) Notice the sensations in your body as you touch the item. (pause) Pay attention to how fast or slow you are breathing. (pause) Continue feeling the texture of your item until your breathing slows and you feel calm. Continue stroking or rubbing your items until you both feel at peace.

Repeat this practice a few times at home before using it in a setting where your child may be anxious. Then invite your child to bring their item with them when going to the doctor, dentist, or therapist to help them find and maintain their peace during a stressful experience. Bring your item as well so you can model using it to calm yourself, too.

Some children may identify multiple items that soothe them. If so, keep them all in your bag or box and encourage your child to select the one they want to use at a particular time. This act of agency communicates that they can choose how to manage their emotions even when they feel overwhelmed.