My family often makes soft caramels to share with family and friends. I stir the ingredients in the pot as the house fills with their sugary scent. Afterwards, we watch movies and individually wrap each candy. It’s an experience that brings us together and helps us connect with others.
The book Lasagna Means I Love You, by Kate O’Shaughnessy, explores the role that special foods have in our lives. For example, Joe explains that cooking and serving his mother’s special lasagna recipe conveys love to others. Read the book with elementary children and use one or more of the following activities to dive into the link between food and relationships.
Letter writing. The book is framed in a series of letters that Mo writes to her grandmother. Nan has died, and writing is a way that Mo stays connected with her. Invite children to write a letter to a family member, friend, or pet (living or dead) that they miss or care about. Encourage them to share the letter with the recipient (if living) or save it for rereading (if deceased).
Resisting bias. When Mo is placed with June and Tate, Ricky sees the situation as unfair. He believes that Mo has more opportunities for placement because she is white and ot black like him. His comments resonate with Mo and she speaks out about this unfairness. Invite children to reflect on the biases they see in their community. Ask: How do you think people are treated differently because of their race [gender, personality, beliefs]? Use a decision matrix (see Related Resources) to identify ways they might respond when someone is being treated unfairly.
Cooking with love. Mo finds a family cookbook on a shelf. Each recipe is accompanied by a story about why the recipe is important. For example, they would make Chicken Lemon soup to help sick family members feel better. Invite children to draw a picture of one or more of their family’s special dishes. Encourage them to share stories about why those dishes are important.
Big feelings. When Mo has big, uncomfortable feelings, she breaks dishes by knocking them off the counter. Mo’s social worker notes that this isn’t an appropriate response. Ask children: How do you express big, uncomfortable feelings? What helps you manage those feelings? Using their responses and additional brainstorming, create a list of safe and effective ways of expressing and managing such feelings. Suggest that kids keep the list somewhere as a reminder of their options.
Hard goodbyes. Mo is surprised and upset when June and Tate decide they are moving to France and will not be taking Mo with them. She runs away to Joe and Carlito’s house. Ask children: How would you feel if you were Mo? What would you want to tell June and Tate? What do you think they would say to you in response? Take turns pretending to be each person as you role play possible conversations.
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